I have nothing against rainy weather, in fact it sets the mood for my already lazy life. One thing I dislike is being in the rain and wet clothes. I guess you could call me hypocritical because I also hate umbrellas. Let me specify on that...I hate carrying umbrellas. I have an issue when it comes to schlepping around a lot of items, a purse is enough.
About a year ago while on my way home from school I had no choice but to buy an umbrella, either that or sit on the bus for an hour resembling someone who just got thrown in a pool. I walked into Walgreens and picked myself up an umbrella and for my own personal reasons decided on the big one that doesn't compact itself into the size of a credit card. My thought process didn't get past, that one looks cool and can also double as a cane! And there, my mind was made.
Since that day my umbrella hasn't been used. Why carry around an umbrella all day when you can throw up your hood and run everywhere? You dry eventually. However, this morning when I woke up for work there was a torrential downpour and I had no choice but to take my umbrella out for a walk. It started out well. I got to the bus stop completely dry, imagine that! I started to panic as thoughts of what I would do when I got off the bus started to run through my mind. What would I do when I went to get coffee!? How would it be possible to juggle a purse, coffee and eat my chocolate croissant at the same time! And then when I figure out how to balance all that, how will I find a free limb to open the door to work? I have just come to realize that umbrellas are more stress then they are worth.
What drove home my hatred of umbrellas was the disrespect of others around me. How is it that people think even with an open umbrella above their head, they are the same width as they always are? You can't squeeze between people thinking your umbrella magically folds up its edges for the convenience of everyone else around you! You aren't Moses and I sure as hell am not the red sea. Operating an umbrella should require a license just like driving, people need to be taught about space awareness. When you are under 5 feet tall and walking in front of me, it's not fair for you to just slam on your breaks, slide your short self under my own umbrella and poke me in the eye!
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